Reboot Skeptic Pillows

'Past performance is not an indication of future results.'

'Sorry sir,but we can't just take your word that the boots leak'

Suggestions box in a toilet.

"I do love you, Jerry, but it's somewhere below the conscious level."

Cupid misses his shot.

"Our online romance needs fresh start. I think it's time to hit 'ctrl', 'alt', 'delete'."

'I hate running in the outside lane.'

'Would you like to come in for a rejection?'

"I don't love you anymore, Barry, but I still think you're a great American."

'I think he's in too much pain to answer!'

Cupid's Valentine

'Thanks, but no. It just doesn't add up.'

'You remind me of my ex-ex-ex.'

"I tolerate you too. With all my heart."

"Stop undressing me with your eyes."

'Are you ready to get hurt again?'

Yes, but.

"If only I liked you a little more and you liked like me a little less."

"Oh, you were on automatic pilot? And what about her? Was she on automatic pilot, too?"

Computer tech support sacred offering

Editorial Control

'No wonder the divorce rate is so high!'

Second Thoughts Wedding

'I've got SO much on my plate right now, Steve - Ask me again when I'm fifty.'

"It would never work out- we're from two totally different tiers of the upper middle class."

"Just saying, if you can't trust your software upgrades, what can you trust?"

"I wish your temperature told the real truth about you."

'It's a big step getting married. I need time to think about it - What did you say your name was?'

"Of course I don't love you - why d'you keep asking?"

"It was love at first sight, except for his ringtone."

"Arrows won't work on him. Use a taser."

'According to the voice-stress analyzer, he's not going to lower taxes.'

'Is this a trick question?'