Realtor Humor Fan Pillows

'Did I mention, that the last owner kept snakes?'

"Liable to flooding? Whatever gives you that idea sir?"

Realtors: 'We make house calls'.

An exaggeration of estate agents

Jet flies by. 'And of course it's handy for the airport.'

'Gee! You must have lost some on this property!'

'Someday, Son, all this will be your ex-wife's.'

'Now from this room you can get a great view of the whales going by!'

'Now, it does require some modernisation. . . .'

"Efficiency tombs available"

Estate Agents: Executive Homes

"The high price is due to the great view of the beach."

'Is the fire included?'

"We figured why not make some money while we migrate south."

"Every once in a while this house comes with a pool."

'Considering this is a floating mass of accumulated pond scum, I'd say you're gettin' one heck of a deal.'

"As president of the tenants' association, I have to inform you that our list of grievances has been eaten."

"Come climate change, you could find yourself sitting beach-front on the French riviera."

"For sale £470,000 house included"

'It mostly scares the realtors.'

'Here's the 2 acres of beachfront property you bought - too bad it's only six inches wide.'

"The current owners removed a number of walls and used soft, neutral tones to create a very spacious, open concept."

"Yes, it's nice, but it's lost twenty per-cent of its value in the past year."

"No pressure, but I do have another couple who are very interested."

'There are no skeletons in the closets but you might have troubles with those in the back yard.'

Real estate.

Coming Soon- Trump Circle

"It's a bit of a fixer-upper."

'I'm so glad I moved into this basement flat Mary. It's put me on the property ladder and the neighbours are so friendly!'

'The previous owner broke his leash ...I mean, lease.'

Toughing it out in the real estate game.

Yes. This is definitely a house. The Housing Authority closes another tough case.

'Cosy little kitchen, isn't it?'