Realtor Gifts

"The current owners removed a number of walls and used soft, neutral tones to create a very spacious, open concept."

Dog Realtor

"First time buyers have always been my favorite clients."

'Now before you get all upset, I got ten percent above market value.'

'This is my dream house alright, but in my dream it was about half this price.'

'Empty-nesters. They're hoping to sell before the flock tries to move back in.'

"When I said it might sell faster if you put in a new driveway, I meant if you repaved the old one."

'Can we call a realtor now?!'

"They're willing to throw in their kidneys."

'I just figure out why this house isn't selling.'

'And this is the sunken living room.'

'Looks like you're underwater on your mortgage.'

For Sale, just to find the true value.

'And in addition to a great room, this home has a cool room,super duper room and a totally awesome room.'

The good old days of banking: 'Ok. . . now comes the tricky part.'

"Three bedrooms, living room, dining room, and a little room to negotiate."

'Ready?!'

'And this is the walk-in fireplace... I'd be careful with that.'

'They accepted your offer!!'

"The listing said it's only one block from the beach!"

"Obviously the price of this property is a reflection of it`s very desirable location."

'... And with a little imagination, the workshop and reindeer stables could easily be converted into additional bedrooms.'

'Would you mind holding my printer, my other phone is ringing!'

'I'm retiring soon and looking for something more comfortable...like a loafer.'

'This takes the guesswork out of choosing the site for our new headquarters.'

'We did have one property in your price range, but I'm afraid we sold it in 1943.'

'Brick is overrated. Let me show you something in sticks or straw.'

'The owners like big Christmas trees.'

Valentines for Real Estate

"Whatever you do, keep up with your mortgage payments."

'...And a free set of tools goes with it.'

"Can we close before the next Fed meeting?"

Realtor from the Black Lagoon

'The roof needs icing.'

"Nice, but it's still a fish bowl. We'd like something with a little more privacy."