Reality Show Devotee Gifts

'This just in: An international team of scientists has conclusively proven that life is, indeed, a spectator sport! Details at eleven.'

"The less believable, the more I like the reality show."

Mike (The Situation) is rumored to have written the original manuscript for his best-selling memoir entirely out of bronzer.

"Davina McCall: Life at the Extreme takes a celebrity to the most extreme places on Earth!"

American Idle.

Theatre Crowd

Caution: Driver Watching "Hard Copy"

Adam and Eve on a Talk Show

'Everything is illusory? -- Even reality shows?'

"Here's the deal, boys. We need to see a little more bickering. We're doing a Reality Show."

"Britain's Got Talent is now in its tenth astonishingly brilliant year!"

School Career Choices: Celebrity chef, celebrity gardener,celebrity plumber, celebrity vet, celebrity painter & decorator. . .

Can't Touch This

'We're doing a fly on the wall documentary.'

'Breaking Bad' Box Set Addiction.

"True crime meets reality TV"

'It's a program on paranoia. Every time I leave the room, they stop and wait for me to come back.'

"Do you, Halfomild Tellycelebrtipewhoo-hoo, promise to brush up on matters such as the Hadron Collider?"

'Has Oprah ever been married?'

"Welcome to Sugar Free Farm! The reality show, where celebs go cold turkey on their sugar addictions for two weeks."

"Sorry, my report is blank. I just stayed home, watched tv and played video games during vacation."

"Am I through to the next round?"

Big Brother watching you watch Big Brother

TV and cleaner

"Not tonight. Margie wants to watch some guy deep fry a duck on cable."

America's funniest election gaffes

Jerry Springer of biblical times.

'Ok, Bachelor number 2: What's your idea of a perfect first date?'

"I wanted to deliver a message of hope and tolerance in a complex global society but I decided to update them on the Kardashians instead."

I can now come clean. The person who secretly told me that Mitch McConnell loves Dr. Pimple Popper is … Hold it! Hold it? Commercial break. Nothing' says sexy like cholesterol.

'I'm not sure how you managed to burn a bowl of cereal.'

'Dear, you're not supposed to take it seriously...it's a reality show!'

'What a strange episode -- they just voted Ricardo Montalban off the island!'

'You're not being fired Jenkins. It's just that all our colleagues have booted you out of the company.'

"I suppose we have Judge Judy to thank for all this."