Reading Medical Cartoons T-Shirts

'This is his third operation in two years. I'm putting in a zipper.'

"I'm afraid we'll have to operate. Your appendix has an infection and it's extremely aggressive."

"They're friendly, but they're also carnivorous, so remember that when you're called on to beg and roll over."

'Do you have to use that? -- tongue depressors make me hungry.'

"Could you tell me how to get to cedar grove, New Jersey? I want to see where my grandfather was born."

An organ flies across the room during an operation - 'Catch it...!'

To encourage patients to take their medication, Dr. Gratner brought in a sketch artist to show them what they will look like in six months without meds.

'Restless Peg Syndrome.'

'Doctor, how much acupuncture experience DO you have?'

What the patient heard and what the doctor meant to convey.

'Snap out of it.'

"No. I wouldn't 'like to see the cheese menu'. And I don't appreciate the stereotyping!"

"We disagree with the president - we kinda like Robin Hood - we take from everyone and keep it - how much more successful can you get?"

Prostate Exam Second Opinion

'What doctors really write on prescriptions.'

'I'm here for the organ transplant.'

'Our Anesthesiologist resigned recently.'

"Just give me the truth, Doc...I can tell when you're trying to humor me."

'I'm sending you to see another doctor, he's a specialist in hyperchondria.'

Worse case of chicken pox I've ever seen!

'I would suggest a Cabernet Sauvignon. It's non habit forming. I should know. I've been drinking a glass every day for twenty years.'

Clown's knee reflex sends doctor through ceiling

'Now then, let me explain the rules of this therapy.'

The New A*****e

The Trickledown Effect

M.D. I suppose that will be okay, but no more milk and cookies starting tomorrow.

'...Better clear my schedule too.'

'I tell you what: Thank goodness for tomato sauce...'

'I hear you're quite an advocate of group therapy.'

I'm afraid doctor-patient confidentiality prevents me from saying if your brother cried like a baby during his flu shot.

"The patient in 402 appears to be exhibiting anxiety symptoms, Doctor."

"You were smart to come see, Mr. Lewis. These moles on your back definitely look suspicious."

"I'm suffering from TeaParytyitis."

"You have natural causes.''

Welcome to old age - I come up seven or eight times a night to empty my blowhole, too.