Reading Comic Strips T-Shirts

'As the company's laziest worker, I've made the fewest mistakes. That's why I became Employee of the Month!'

'The doctor is putting you on solids.'

'Mum said I take after your side of the family, Dad!'

"Hello? ...Hello? Baldo? Is that you?"

Grace For Flies

Knock on the door - dog stands up and shouts 'Beat it!'

'I hate to be so skeptical, but I still think the seance business is a hoax!'

'Fetch.'

Doctor describes inside guts while patient has black thoughts.

Billy. The Kid.

'If Earwigs looked like baby seals:'

'No ice.'

'Look around, son. See if there's one you like. But remember: These are abandoned players, unwanted by their teams - so they might come with some psychological baggage.'

'I'm not abandoned. I'm a free agent.'

Pirate Squirrels Looking for Buried Treasure

"The Hound of the Baskervilles, Watson--I took him walkies!"

"The tests confirms you have short-term memory loss."

At home with the Bones...one skeleton yells at the dog chewing his leg, 'now cut that out!'

"Dear Wendy, please excuse the tardiness of my response to your recent tweet from Hoboken."

"Been following me around all morning. I think it's the new intern."

'Actually, we were hoping you guys would have the solution to all our problems.'

Fish hunting for men.

'Why me Lord?' '...because yo have animal magnetism Noah...'

Bill and Lester have a 'Hay Day'.

'Oh no, it's the Burkes! You stall them here while I go fix my hair and don't let them roam around. Remember, once you have cockroaches in your kitchen, you'll never get rid of them.'

'Oh don't listen to him! Norman wasn't a motivational guru... he was just that cat in those silly 'hang in there' posters.'

'Satchel, I have just had a revelation.'

“Sweet mother of Marmaduke... no!”

"Bless You."

'Mom, don't you understand? Those collars are symbols of subservience and repression!'

'It's good to be here. We're having economic problems where we come from.'

'If you want to live a long time, try not to do anything that will kill you.'

"Why is there so much emphasis put on our stupid race?" "I think people are more interested in it as a metaphor than as an actual race." "Slow and steady wins the race, that sort of thing." "That would explain why I always lose..." "Bartender, another please." "Maybe you should slow down." "You never learn do you?"