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Lance, why did you unfriend me on Facebook after pestering me to be your Facebook friend in the first place? Facebook said I reached my friend limit, so I had to dump somebody in order to accept a friend request from Jessica Alba.

Monster Baseball. The team's continuing to have some problems this season. Jekyll is good one day and bad the next. Dracula only shows up for night games. The Mummy is always covered in bandages and on the injured list. And King Kong can't keep his mind on the game --- Whenever he sees a pretty woman, he climbs up into the stands after her! At least Frankenstein has been pitching great again, just like when he was young! Yeah, he has a completely new arm!

Grace For Flies

Hey, calm down --- Now, what did you say again?

Today we'll see some misused or misunderstood financial and economic terms. It's said inflation can hurt the economy. But it's absolutely in the tire business. I bought this warm puffy jacket with cash. A down payment. We like beer and coffee. Our most valuable liquid assets. In a monopoly breakup, the race car would to go one person and the dog to another. And when I become either a buyer or a seller. He's shorting the market!

They're Not Just That Into It

Batman at the Maternity Ward

'I hate to be so skeptical, but I still think the seance business is a hoax!'

Doctor describes inside guts while patient has black thoughts.

Fly Football

'That's not really what I meant by 'let your hair down', Rapunzel.'

"And you're certain these are accidents?"

'Look around, son. See if there's one you like. But remember: These are abandoned players, unwanted by their teams - so they might come with some psychological baggage.'

'Sire, Sodom and Gomorrah are requesting Federal disaster relief aid.'

Assault 'n' Vinegar

"So, you say I'll be doubling the numbers of animals I kill?"

"You're turn to grill tonight Adam, you make the best ribs."

"Would you relax? All you guys are so tense. I just wanted to tell you to your face how enigmatic I find you."

"Please ask your pet to kindly put down the weapon."

"Easy for you to say - you're cured!"

'I'm not abandoned. I'm a free agent.'

Pirate Squirrels Looking for Buried Treasure

"But if you cure my hypochondria I won't have any hobbies."

Mister Bundles VS. The Martians - Party Twenty Three

They try, but those crows can't make noises they used to. The lost caws!

Mister Bundles VS. The Martians - Part Thirty Four

"If you'd only come to me sooner I wouldn't have had to go to lunch."

"Don’t worry, this guy is totally cool. Just don’t mention the Red Baron."

Mister Bundles VS. The Martians - Part Fifteen

'Alright, which one of you wise guys pulled the fire alarm?'

"The tests confirms you have short-term memory loss."

At home with the Bones...one skeleton yells at the dog chewing his leg, 'now cut that out!'

Please Drove Carefully.

'Actually, we were hoping you guys would have the solution to all our problems.'

Fish hunting for men.