Reading Champ Pillows

Man reading while being surrounded by TV's

"There's something weird about Emily. She actually likes school!"

Inclusive speech

"If it doesn't happen on Facebook, it didn't happen."

Examinations.

"I think I gained weight because of the heavy reading Mr. Klacken assigns us."

One of the failed candidates for the copyrighters job wants to know 'wat was rong with his applicashun'.

'Is there such a thing as over communicating?'

"I wouldn't mind...But he's the teacher."

'Hey! I just started my James Patterson novel and I'm on chapter 97!' 'You read 20 pages already?'

Bird on phone: 'Hold on, I have caw waiting.'

"Not sure what to watch? Go to menu/settings/power/off/pick up a book."

"Is it a 'personal attack' if I can prove he’s an idiot?"

"Are you busy or are you at work?"

"You were right, honey, she was tired... I only had to read six books to her tonight!"

"I subscribed to a collector's magazine! It has great interviews with big-time collectors who buy the world's rarest treasures."

"What do you mean you're staying in with a good book?"

Time to pick a reading partner and get to reading!

'If you want to save your marriage, tell each other you're sorry.' 'Youre sorry!'

"Mum, you've put it on mute with sub-titles!"

"This call is monitored for quality. Try to keep up your end of the conversation."

"School can be tricky. They give you text books that have NOTHING to do with texting!"

"You're not holding up your end of the conversation."

"Once again, the answer is no."

'We're never going to sort out our marital problems like this. Can't we speak to one of your colleagues, darling?'

'The bad news is that we've had to inform clients of drastic cuts to services...We managed to do it in 17 languages!'

"No, they're not kids on a fields trip. They're from out IT department. They seem to be getting younger and younger these days."

Parent about kid reading 'Improving Your Video Gaming': 'It's the only way I could get him to read.'

'He processed the words all by himself!'

"Anyway, Her Royal Highness here insists I'm sarcastic."

'Trying to think of a word for two weeks? How about 'fortnight'?'

'Don't do the funny voices Dad. You make the giant sound gay.'