Reading Advertisements Gifts

'How 'bout this darling? Big dog for sale, eats anything. Very fond of children.'

''You may already have won the war....''

'Which sounds better: 'now with MORE XZ100' or 'now with LESS XZ100'?'

'Just sitting around letting advertisers brainwash me. What about you?'

Generic Store: Sign in Window

'We raised the price, so at least as far as we're concerned it's new and improved.'

"Ah yes, I know this bit...it's from the advert!"

"Joe's cereal. NPR co-approved."

Real Estate Personals

"Who is the fairest of them all? Well, Madame, the answer comes right after this commercial break! Stay tuned!!"

As Seen Watching TV

F1 - Quit Smoking.

"I love this comedy. What's it called?"

'Thank goodness for these commercials on the nightly news or we'd never be aware that we need all these prescription medications.'

"Satan's on the line, sir. He says the soul you sent doesn't look like the one in the ad."

This Space Available.

'Big-time operators are standing by....'

'Of course he's an actor. When was the last time you saw a kid enjoy something that was good for him?'

DRINK LAFARGE'S ALE, 'He's trying his best to balance tyhe budget.'

'I like this new alcohol labelling.'

Junk Mail

'I hate these commerical breaks!'

Eat More Salted Nuts

"The Closer, Cleaner, Smoother Reaper."

'...No, he can't really fly...no, the bad guys don't really have a gun...no this cereal really isn't the best food in the whole world...no, it won't make you as strong as a giant...'

Before we begin tonight's dream, a word from our sponsor...

Your next cartoon will follow after these advertisements

'Thank you for picking me as your ATM machine...but before I dispense your money, here's a word from Ed's Bar & Grill...'

'I can't believe they're using my mantra to sell beer.'

Forget Your Worries at Velton Corners, Spa.

"He's a genius at product placement."

Visit Our Gift Shop

'Hey! -- that Maytag repairman is an impostor!'

"We used to think sugar and spice were all things nice - until that was proved to be a lie put out by global food manufacturers."

"This looks good."