Raking Aficionado Gifts

A man with a rake on a desert island

"Yes. I said 2 by 2, but you needed to use 2 by 4s for the Ark...begin again."

The experienced backpacker.

"There's really not much to obedience school. Just listen up and do what they say."

"I think I've figured out why we can't find the marina."

But is it organic?

'Originally he was the mascot until we discovered he had a golden foot.'

"I'm not growling, it's my stomach rumbling!"

Tommy Cooper at the bottle bank - Glass, Bottle, Bottle, Glass..

"It's the Environment's Agency's new H.Q."

'Arf! Arf!'

"We have a potentially serious problem accruing on the poop deck."

"My owner is teaching me to think before barking, which gave Federal Express plenty of time to clobber me."

'Can you give him something to relax his jaws?'

'It's a bold initiative but I don't think it's right for the staff kitchen.'

Dog phrenology

'I imagine you'd like to hear about my progress...'

'Sure, he acts like he's into you now, but, trust me...he's only interested in one thing.'

'Don't you think they'd be better off in the water?'

Rubbish and Everest

"Noah, what do you think are the most dangerous animals you've brought abroad the ark?"

'Well, I thought crankbaits made really great stocking stuffers.'

Dog in therapy.

'Wow, it's busy...I hope we can find a barking spot!'

"My dog always knows when it's about to rain."

Frank N. Stein - Evirnomentalist.

(Pirate about rat): 'We became buddies when they threw me in the hole.'

Select a song: Another Dog Barking. Lots of Other Dogs Barking. Howling. Siren. Doorbell. Dog Karaoke.

Dog

"Say something like 'Bow-wow' or 'Arf-arf' and you'll really break them up."

'Let me put this in dog terms: Woof! Woof! Bark! Bark! Bow-wow-wow!'

Sergeant Stripes

'Suddenly Jake was confronted by the dreaded raffler'

Spring/Summer/Winter

'Can't understand all this fuss over cattle growth hormones.'