Railway Historians Gifts

'it's a special for nostalgia buffs.'

'You may now turn over your paper and begin.' - 'Sir!' - 'Yes?' - 'What is it?' - 'I think Train 'A' and Train 'B' might be going to crash!'

"Excuse me, I think you'll find I've reserved that luggage rack space ..."

Replacement Bus Spotters.

A trevor of trainspotters

'This Mouse is going to be huge!'

Latest Railway Marvel.

"'COST: shedloads, COMPLETION DATE: God knows.' Perhaps you'd care to flesh out some details for us."

'Trains traditionally run late, it rains on bank holidays and Yorkshire pudding is a main course.'

Run from the hills!

Sushi Train Spotters

HS2

"Honesty, I saw a train yesterday"

"Is this the Canterbury Train?"

HS2 time bomb...

S**t Creek Halt

L.A. Transfer

'You can see the excuses in the news now, it will be 'The wrong sort of rain'!'

An argument between a passenger and a train porter.

'We don't keep cash on the premises.'

An old gentleman speaking with a shoeblack at a train station

"Politicians can't make the trains run on time but they never miss the gravy train."

The Train to Nowhere

A train's dining car is a diner.

Isambard Kingdom Brunel.

'Arrivals and Departures - this railroad governed by Heisenberg's uncertainty principle'

'I know it's harrowing and distressing, but please Mr. Benson, tell me again about your daily train journey to work.'

'It will bring economic benefits to the North and Midlands.'

Executive Lifestyle

"I'm ringing you because there's nobody in the carriage to annoy..."

"Kevin's job as a train announcer seriously affected his love-life..."

'Well, if they don't go chuff chuff anymore. . . how do they go?'

'It's so called because I expect the ticket prices to rocket!'

What Holds the Subway Together?

Railway 'King' George Hudson