Rage Reader Gifts

'I said do you have any books on anger management?!'

Breaking News: Earth Crosses Multiple Lanes, Crashes into Sun... Distracted Orbiting to Blame.

Letters escape from a caged book.

Fear of news.

"I'm torn, Randy. I don't know what to think." "About what, little buddy?" "Star Trek. The last movie got rave reviews. Critics and audiences loved it. Therefore, I loved it too. But it didn't come anywhere close to earning $1 billion at the box office. And these days, any movie that doesn't earn $1 billion is a complete failure. Therefore, I must hate it. I'm in limbo until the hive mind comes to a consensus." "Except for honey, nothing good ever comes from hives."

'Is there a psychiatrist in the house - the cast is very depressed over opening night reviews!'

'We loved this book. Twenty nine experts tell you how to think independently.'

'Social and political revolution? Check out our 'Do It Yourself' section.'

'And I say he makes us look bad when he rides around listening to those books.'

'Hey! I just started my James Patterson novel and I'm on chapter 97!' 'You read 20 pages already?'

The Daily Fury

Man reading 'Bankruptcy for Dummies'.

'The only New Year's resolution he's still got intact is not to watch the England cricket team in Australia on television.'

"When in the course of human events it becomes... Oh, blast it! Adams is just going to edit the heck out of this..."

Declutter Your Life

A new book with a little bit of this and a little bit of that.

'The sun lounge book of melanomas.'

'Oooh! My cousin got a 5 star review! What's it say?'

'Read any good book reviews lately?'

Graduate

"You'll find all the adult 'Dummies and Idiots' guide books in the children's section."

"He's new here."

'Assume your positions - let's bring these Humans TO THEIR KNEES!'

"I suppose I could fake it."

'This container lists only one hundred of the most common side effects. More can be found on the manufacturer's website.'

Success Without Effort

Police Academy - Remedial Reading of Rights

'He's always trying to trick people into cheap labour.'

"Of course, the smoke detectors never stop in hell!"

Mao Zedong.

"You've really got to read this book, it's full of dynamite ideas!"

"Feel free to imagine you might have any of the conditions you read about in the magazines."

"Animal Liberation by Peter Singer"

"They should open the files - Lenin never said all those crazy things attributed to him."