Radio Waves Gifts

Chris Evans

Surfer Blowing Back His Hair.

"I love it when you use your 'All Things Considered' voice."

'We interrupt this programme for a sex flash.'

"It's Dr. Sadie. Go ahead, caller." "Yeah, how come you haven't said 'Merry Christmas' yet?" "Oh, that’s because I was hoping to provoke everyone who’s upset about the so-called 'war on Christmas' to spend all their time on hold waiting to castigate me. That way, all the normal people who don’t think Christmas is just another chance to play the victim can open their gifts in peace." "You're welcome, America." "Why haven't you played 'Jingle Bells' yet?"

"Still Undecided Political Blocs"

"'Original' to 'Carbon-Paper': Do you copy?"

Pre-Television Man Caves

Non Thought For The Day.

'Oh, come on - If you're gonna mess up my castle, take the whole thing.'

"Joe's cereal. NPR co-approved."

"This just in — I no longer have a job."

Sports Radio in Crisis

"Boss, remember when you told me to start charging Sadie 'studio fees' for operating her radio show in the cafe?" "Well, I've got good news and bad news." "What's the good?" "She's agreed not to resort to violence." "I see. And the bad news?" "On today's 'Sadie Cohen Radio Show': Evil cafe owners who may or may not poison their customers."

"An appointment? Let's see... She could fit you in before breakfast TV, or after lunch on Radio Two, or between Radio Four afternoon and the Drive Home SHow..."

"Did you hear Sadie's show today?"

Not-so-easy listening...

Woah, This was well worth swapping my flying saucer for!

'Howard can't come to the phone now. He's standing by for a major concert announcement.'

Man from 'National Viewers and Listeners Association sits at work boxes titled; 'Switch on' and 'Switch off'.

"I've been invited to two different thanksgivings...One with family, one with friends, which one do I go to?"

She kept Dracula at bay with an episode of the Archers.

Kidnapping Lord Haw-Haw

Easy & Hard Listening Rock Radio.

"He had a request for me on the radio today. He wanted me to bring him a cup of tea."

Wally flunks the test: The Emergency Broadcast System.

TV SALES, 'Will the violence chip block out Glenn Beck?'

'I'm Bored'