Racing Fans Gifts

Fast food

Steep Hill, Slippery When Wet, Watch for Cars Going Faster Than You.

Race track - with the race being to apply the white lines between lanes

'Humans seem to be so weight-conscious: My rider weighs himself before each race...'

"If you think I ride too fast, Susan...just say so!"

The polar olympics

"What now?" Runners disturbing loggers

'Geoffrey's kit car can go from nought to upside down in under nine seconds.'

'God's speed.'

Smile

Gentlemen Riders

First past the post.

Formula One car origami

Horse racing puns

"Did you see neighhhhhh...bours last night?"

Pig Trotter

The Bagel Wheel Derby.

22. Being tireless is good trait to have in most jobs, but not when you're working on a pit crew.

'Was Monty the culprit? Had he fixed a horse race? He couldn't remember.'

Valentino Rossi (the Doctor)

'Apparently she looks stunning naked'

1st Place in the Egg and Spoon Race

Daily News Headline Dept. Editor. Here's a story about a guy who shaved his race horse to cut wind resistance, and the horse got a terrible sunburn. "A pony shaved is a pony burned"!

'I believe you were first.'

Racing pit crew member holds sign for driver: Stop And Ask For Directions.

'Speed bump ... no sound barrier.'

'On your mark, get set...'

'I'd recommend leaving risky investments. Put your money into something safe. Have you ever thought of betting on horses?'

The Priceless Ming Vase Relays.

'Enough deodorant! This isn't what a pit crew does!'

'I'd bet that with that race engine, you could beat anybody to the neighborhood grocery store.'

'I know you felt great after ten laps around the track, Mr. Fandella, but remember you were driving.'

'Soon I will have proved it ONCE AND FOR ALL!'

Only horse I know that likes to start out of the crouch. 6 3.

Panto Horse at the Races