Quizzical Curator Gifts

'I'm not sure if I'm qualified to be sniffy about this one.'

Turd - 'It's one of a kind.'

$1: Family Secrets

A Snowman using a Pooper-Scooper to pick up his Dog's ice cube Doo Doo

A sign that reads "ART...and plenty of it!" hangs above the entrance to a museum.

Man looks at huge dinosaur fossil in garden, saying: 'It looks great in the rockery, but don't you think you should call the Natural History Museum?'

"Bootsy has welcomed the vacuum robot into our home in her own unique way."

Gianni Tatti's Dining-Room Chair

"Bingo, it's the hippy lady again! She always throws something interesting: last week it was honey-beer bread..."

"Their entire planet is coated in things called doodads, tchotchkes, trinkets, knick-knacks, bric-a-brac, and clutter."

E-commerce for shoplifters.

Private View.

The institute.

Through the Looking Glass-King's Messenger in Prison

"I hear he has more than bones buried."

"It looks like fecal transplants may do us in."

'My God, you're right - they are all back issues of TV guide.'

Warning, the Surgeon General warns that prolonged viewing of this product may be hazardous to your health.

Jeff hadn't quite anticipated how he'd feel exhibiting his art publicly for the first time.

"This is one of his early works, from before he was able to throw the paint and actually hit the canvas."

"I want to travel the world, bringing home ugly little trinkets."

My first rodeo

"Wow, Leonardo! Science, art, inventions. . . Can't you focus?!?"

"Yes, we cater to a rather specialized clientele."

'I'm just adding to my collection of figurines.'

'I can't find my mobile, oh, it's next to my ear.'

'What if there were no hypothetical situations?'

"No matter how many times I study it—always more and more cognizant of its anomalies and repetitions, defying all logic—I am nevertheless drawn into its bewitching spell!"

"Have you noticed how the conservatives who believe in small government all want to work in big business?"

"Remember! If there is a duvetyne curtain leading to a blackened room, we shall pass through it. If headphones are required, we will wear them. We shall push any button and read every text, for we are artists and we are unafraid."

2020 vs. 2023

"They have fringe beliefs but appear normal in order to maximize shock value when they start spouting them."