Quirky Urbanite Gifts

"I thought we agreed you weren't going to work at home."

'It's Darwin's only chance to practice when he's in the city.'

Smoking in the city.

'You can come back in, King Kong. The superintendent got the door open.'

"Did you remember to take the trash in?"

No Immediate Danger

"Who knew we had so many dislikes in common?"

Mr Metrosexual.

"What's wrong, girl? Trouble? Rachel can't decide which private school to attend?" "Upper West Side Lassie"

Through Traffic Keep Left/We're Through Traffic Keep Right

"I thought we'd eat out on the patio for a change."

"I like New York, but I miss sleeping drunk on my front lawn."

'It's a sign of the times, a high rise block of caves reserved for hermits.'

"Sure, it's 'beautiful,' Ray, but where are the outlet stores?!"

Conan the Barbarian's brother- Charles the Civilized.

"Maybe what's good for Wall Street isn't good for Main Street, but it's great for Tribeca."

"The end of my patience is near!"

'I forgot to close the door?...Seriously? Who puts a door on a hole?'

'Those combination sink/urinals are great.'

'And this is the walk-in laundry chute.'

"Hold on, I'm not a Hatfield or a McCoy—I'm from Brooklyn."

"Did I just butt-dial my booty call?"

Urban snail

CAN'T FIND CHARGER

Third-Floor Rapunzel

"Everybody seems to be in such a hurry these days!"

"Pleased to meet you neighbour! I'm the first wave of gentrification."

Urban therapy.

'I'm mixing drinks. Would you like a womanhattan with me?'

Bikini Between Buildings

'Sunday morning, love - time to conceptualize brunch!'

WARNING! The city is a cold heartless place.

"I reckon we've gone too far accommodating them townies."

He's made a putting green on the second floor.

Landscape Painter