Quirky Things Pillows

Great we have mice.

"There are mysteries up here on the 13th floor. Like who keeps locking the exit door? Why is that clock always 12 minutes fast? And who actually eats the liverwurst sandwiches from that machine?"

"We're bringing the arts and sciences together here by giving crayons to mice."

'Oh, Arthur...You sweet, blind, mad, dear, silly fool....Don't you see it could never last?'

'RUN FOR COVER!!!!! It's another one of those 'Baby Showers'!!!

"No, ma'am. I'm not sure what the difference is between being creative or just plain weird."

Raincloud Umbrella

"....Oh, and the dog's eaten all the fridge magnets."

Best before 65 million BC.

'Half-baked beans, low fat variety' "Who says we have no taste?"

Joined at the hipster.

A golden Big Boy holding a plate of poop

"Trust me, this is as weird for me as it is for you."

Ball as water-melon.

Mystery Solved - Boxers or Briefs, 'Thanks but you could have just told me.'

"Of course they're permanent. I'm an artist."

"I want to be a more interesting person. Think maybe watching old black and white movies would do it?"

"Now that's what I'M talkin' 'bout!"

Man finishing painting through flap in door.

Dog admiring hairless dog calendar

Texturing the Walls

We're making progress building a staff for the palace. The king's lawyer and accountant has sealed lips, of course. Putting a big heart in the charity foundation chief, and building the gardener with a green thumb were excellent choices, Ernie. But the entertainers sill need some fixes. The jester doesn't have a funny bone. I'm nobody's fool. And you have the minstrel a tin ear! Oops.

"Sorry - He's changed His mind again. Stripes on the zebra, spots on the giraffe, no stars on the lion and make the elephant bigger and the amoebae smaller."

"Hell, Mom! How's it look?!" "Holy mackerel."

"Albert is the first whistler to use hearing aid feedback as an intro to one of his tunes."

A Specialty Bookstore Chain that Failed, 'Untitled Books.'

"Somehow, some way, we have to guide these people back to reality!"

Celebrity Phrenologist.

"Cliff's really devoted to his art. He'll wait hours for someone to take a shot to the groin."

Weight lifter using his foot to take a photograph.

Victoria's secret lovers: Barry, Al, Percy.

Children's Book Publisher. It should be good for lots or repeat sales

"My two-year-old actually did paint that."

"Sometimes I'm sorry I ever ran away with you."

"I didn't have a carrot so I used a fish stick for his nose."