Quirky Talent Seeker T-Shirts

"A Ph.D. in particle physics, experience in aerospace and rocketry...of course I can juggle."

"Everyone here has a PH.D. in astrophysics. We need someone who can yodel."

Todd realises his ability to levitate tea bag string will never translate into hard cash.

"Any other skills?"

'And I see you've listed opposable thumbs as your greatest asset...'

'Says here you can tear phonebooks in half? Well, security could use a man like you in our shredding department!'

'We're looking for someone to liven up our Monday morning job meetings. Can you handle it Chuckles?'

"Well, you certainly seem to have a lot to offer this company, and, of course, the truffles are a hell of a plus."

"Actually, the job calls for someone who is convex."

'I let my merit badges do the talking.'

'Smith, where exactly did you get your experience in 'Hedge Fund Management'?'

"What sets you apart from other candidates?"

"And do you have any OTHER skills you can bring to the post apart from being able to burp the Beatles greatest hits?"

Urine Catcher

'My resume,...in rap form!'

"Hire him. You can't teach shadows like that."

"And the hiring committee was very impressed with your no nonsense attitude during the interview."

"I work well independently. I usually correct all the problems I create."

'Oh, sow some interest! How many 8-year-olds can play the '1812' on a vacuum hose?'

True, I've seen plenty of padded resumes, but very few bejeweled resumes.

'Man, I gotta find a new gig!'

"An MBA, a PhD, AND good at catching mice? Wow!"

"He's at grade level for everything except cursing. He's swearing at a 9th grade level."

"She's not all over you, but she gets the job done."

'I can assure you Mr. Rumplestilkskin, weaving straw into gold is a skill we can certainly use...'

"Well we are looking for people with a wide range of skills."

Man in the stocks on his typewriter.

Man feeds ducks, then ducks feed man.

ROBOT EMPLOYMENT AGENCY, 'We don't have much on hand right now --how'd you like to be a Pez dispenser?'

'I think I've finally found my own niche.'

"I don't get you. You can soft shoe, play the ukulele and juggle, but you can't fetch a pair of slippers."

'My mum can play the piano by ear.'

'Looks like the sexton position is still vacant.'

Firemen rescue mushrooms and pepperoni with a pizza.

"Mum, can I work in a morgue"