Quirky Talent Seeker Pillows

"A Ph.D. in particle physics, experience in aerospace and rocketry...of course I can juggle."

"Everyone here has a PH.D. in astrophysics. We need someone who can yodel."

Todd realises his ability to levitate tea bag string will never translate into hard cash.

"Any other skills?"

'And I see you've listed opposable thumbs as your greatest asset...'

'We're looking for someone to liven up our Monday morning job meetings. Can you handle it Chuckles?'

'Says here you can tear phonebooks in half? Well, security could use a man like you in our shredding department!'

"Well, you certainly seem to have a lot to offer this company, and, of course, the truffles are a hell of a plus."

"Actually, the job calls for someone who is convex."

'I let my merit badges do the talking.'

'Smith, where exactly did you get your experience in 'Hedge Fund Management'?'

"What sets you apart from other candidates?"

"And do you have any OTHER skills you can bring to the post apart from being able to burp the Beatles greatest hits?"

Urine Catcher

'My resume,...in rap form!'

"And the hiring committee was very impressed with your no nonsense attitude during the interview."

"Hire him. You can't teach shadows like that."

"I work well independently. I usually correct all the problems I create."

'Oh, sow some interest! How many 8-year-olds can play the '1812' on a vacuum hose?'

"An MBA, a PhD, AND good at catching mice? Wow!"

"He's at grade level for everything except cursing. He's swearing at a 9th grade level."

'Man, I gotta find a new gig!'

"She's not all over you, but she gets the job done."

'I can assure you Mr. Rumplestilkskin, weaving straw into gold is a skill we can certainly use...'

"Well we are looking for people with a wide range of skills."

Man in the stocks on his typewriter.

Man feeds ducks, then ducks feed man.

"I don't get you. You can soft shoe, play the ukulele and juggle, but you can't fetch a pair of slippers."

'My mum can play the piano by ear.'

"Mum, can I work in a morgue"

OWZAT...The beer-mat-flipping champion sets a new world record!

'Looks like the sexton position is still vacant.'

'...open beer bottles with his teeth.'

Firemen rescue mushrooms and pepperoni with a pizza.

Baggage Claim: Anyone Who Knows How To Hot-Wire A Car.