Quirky Talent Lover Pillows

'...open beer bottles with his teeth.'

OWZAT...The beer-mat-flipping champion sets a new world record!

Anna Calvi

"I love you, you big fool."

"I'll bet you can't name three of their songs."

Stan Mack's Real Life Funnies: The David Letterman Show Goes to the Dogs, Cats, Birds, Guinea Pigs...

"This next song is about narrow-minded record executives and their reluctance to take a chance on anything a bit different."

"And do you have any OTHER skills you can bring to the post apart from being able to burp the Beatles greatest hits?"

"This next song is also about air-conditioning."

"Any other skills?"

"Here's another one about Teddy bears."

The Dancing Academy

"Interested in some romantic punk rock during your dinner?"

"Hire him. You can't teach shadows like that."

"A Ph.D. in particle physics, experience in aerospace and rocketry...of course I can juggle."

'Oh Gloria, I love you with all my heart, part of my liver and most of my lower intestine.'

"Sometimes Ben does very dumb things. I love that in him."

'Our financial troubles are over, Edna. The fellas and I have formed a boy band.'

'My next song is a little ditty about why I don't have any references,'

"He's at grade level for everything except cursing. He's swearing at a 9th grade level."

"She doesn’t fetch or roll over or anything really, but she’s a terrific whistler."

Tom Mullica.

'Oh, sow some interest! How many 8-year-olds can play the '1812' on a vacuum hose?'

"I owe my success to him. I figured, if he can make it, so can I."

Adult Magician

"You must be a computer geek, because I've never had anyone ask me to accept their 'Terms of Use' before a date."

"They listen to weird music, dress funny and you don't dare go into the bathroom after they've been in there!"

"No-chance the rapper"

'Have you got to have a Gimmick.'

"I don't get you. You can soft shoe, play the ukulele and juggle, but you can't fetch a pair of slippers."

'My mum can play the piano by ear.'

Alison Pill

'Mentoring requires many sophisticates qualities and skills...'

Street sweeper with an umbrella on his broom.

Musician with eyepatch