Quirky Storytelling Aficionado Gifts

'You'll never guess who I ran into yesterday!'

"Did you sleep awkwardly again?"

'Where was the TSA?'

'You're going to have your future cut out for you, reading bedtime stories.'

Goodnight Moon for the Misbegotten

"Sorry lad, ye can't be having' me pot o' toilet paper."

Cow talking to dog: 'What...You eat your own...?!'

The Awful Lawfuls Chapter 10

Overshadowed by the Tony's: Broadway's Lesser Known Awards

This is the new Director's Cut version of Hansel and Gretel...with additional scenes and three alternative endings!!!

'We're doing a fly on the wall documentary.'

"Hello, my name is Karl and I'm addicted to speaking to small groups of strangers."

"I now pronounce you a partial place setting."

The Family Joules: Part 5

Jacques et Jille

"POOPIN'! It's the Butt Signal!"

'This court finds you guilty Mr. Jones. As your punishment, the bailiff here will slug you one.'

"It's true, mommy...the chocolate bunny attacked me - it was self-defense!"

"Oh, it's alright. You couldn't know that I'm honey-intolerant."

How I met your mother

"Well, sir, it looks like things are getting pretty serious for Peter and Pauline."

'Not only do we have no natural enemies we have no natural friends.'

My Spam Sketchbook

Fishing.

Meet the author Billy Bovine.

"I was kicked out from another kid's bed. Do you mind if I crash under yours for awhile?"

"The usual."

'There's a little bit of my late husband in every glass - I used his ashes as a fining agent.'

"Really, Larry? Of all the things that could have bitten you, you get a wereduck?"

Pets in Attorney's office - 'The iguana gets everything.'

"We started losing money right around the time we decided to just lazily remake old movies with the race or gender of the main character switched from the original." "We're burning through cash and we urgently need to course correct and try something different." "So we're going to make fresh stories with new and interesting characters?" "What?" "No."

"This little piggy went to market, this little piggy drove the getaway car..."

Drug Testing Unit: 'Uh Oh!'

"I've finally finished my lockdown novel."

"What do you suppose Ken Burns will have to say about all this in 30 years?"