Quirky Solution Seeker Gifts

Air fresheners being pumped into the city's sewers.

"Vending machine is junk. For $1.00 I'll beat on it for you."

"Stop the barking .50"

'We keep him to deal with all the junk mail'

"Well, you said you wanted something to remove spiders from the bath!"

"You owe us more than your house is worth. One of our depositors will be moving in with you to help even things out."

"How about wearing heavier shoes?"

'And, if the adhesive doesn't work, here's a free box of thumb tacks.'

"I used to worry that I might get sick from contaminated food but I came up with a great solution. I've stopped eating."

"Yeah, but that one's a little bit hard to reach."

Problem Solving: Man rows desert island to land.

Bar snacks served in bird-feeders.

One man's obstacle is another man's stepping stone.

'Lining my pockets with aluminum foil so I can sneak Thanksgiving leftovers home.'

"I like this Carl, you've come up with more solutions than we have problems."

"The way you look at me, Craig... you really see me."

'Cock-a-doodle-doo!' 'Cut back on the chicken soup.'

'Think tank' and 'Rethink tank'.

"The problem with your reasoned solutions is they don't fit my preconceived notions of the problems."

'The guy in the scarecrow shop promised me that nothing scares crows better than the 'Giant Fox XR50'.'

'The problem is you're a perfectionist. You don't always have to be totally evil. Sometimes it's OK to just be annoying.'

'I have nobody else to blame but myself so we need to brainstorm.'

"My great-uncle Octavio always wore his hat in the house. That way, if bad company knocked on the door, he could say he was just leaving."

"For Pete's sake, Helen, will you break down and buy a hair dryer!"

"I'd prefer a win-win solution – but I'm open to just a win."

"On second thought, could you take it out and just teach him how to use the door knob?"

Attitude Counselor.

"Fear not, Miss Hathaway. Just go home and listen to a cd of howling wolves or screeching monkeys and by Monday you'll be ready for your 3rd grade class."

'Unfortunately we're approaching the expiration dates on most of our quick-fix solutions.'

Problem solving centre.

Father cuts the legs off of bed to solve the 'monster under the bed problem.'

'...Sure, I can tell you how to prevent getting old...You can lie about your age...You can smoke...And you can drive drunk...'

'Well, we've divided an elegant solution. Do we have any elegant problems?'

"See no more hiccups."

'Part of the problem, meet part of the solution.'