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Bargoyles

"You're welcome to stay, but the household goes all nude after 9pm."

"The club scene is really changing."

LEMONADE, 'Actually, I hate places like this.'

"I didn't even know Smallville had a set!"

'I wish i could think of some way to get away form him.' 'I wish i could think of some way to get away form her.'

"I keep telling her she should do something with her stupid little online pieces."

'Actually, I hate places like this.'

"There's a notice from the co-op board. Would we be interested in playing softball on the Great Lawn?"

Health organizations doubt the benefits of skiing holidays.

"Me: I never get invited to anything Also me: Sorry, I'm so tired, think I'll stay in."

'Actually, I hate places like this.'

"I'm leaving Friday and we are all going to the club after work. Will you come?"

'Hello! I don't believe I've bored you yet...'

'I have kindergarten burnout!'

'You look like a fun guy!'

"Oh, great—here comes that crazy #@!*%! Jeff who won't shut up about conspiracy theories. How's my hair look?"

Hello- I'm a Wreck.

"We're in the city now, Bob—stop making eye contact with everyone."

'With Jesse Caldwell trasferring to another school, I've been promoted in the playground pecking order.'

"She might have stayed longer if you answered the door with your pants on."

'I've got to go, Mom - my playgroup called an emergency meeting,'

Oh no! Here comes another lecture on the joys of loft living!

"This martini in canonical."

"I shall never forget Roger."

"Come on, smile, it's for our food blog..."

Golf club to putter: 'Leave the driving to us.'

"Billy, pulling my pigtail isn't what I consider 'networking.'"

"I'm not wearing any thermal underwear."

"Is he bothering you?"

"Guys' heads are like rooms. They look much bigger when they're empty."

". . . and so the wife says to me. . . Earl she said, you really have to stop talking to strangers."

'I've got to go, Mom -- my playgroup called an emergency meeting.'

"I hope my wife doesn't see this."

"Believe me.... it's times like these that your pedigree comes into question!"