Quirky Royalists Gifts

'It creeps me out when he watches the History Channel and takes notes!'

'Dang! I never now if the sommelier is messing with me.'

King with the boom box.

Man can levitate but can't hold fingers properly.

Consenting Adults.

"And to think he started in accounting."

The Queen

"You need a mint."

"I'm hooking up with this guy who makes the funniest typos."

"Of course we were made for each other. We were cloned in a laboratory!"

'I hate to rush you, but I'm getting a leg cramp.'

'You'd better put yours on, too -- The MacBeths are coming for dinner.'

Tunnel of Dove.

Coventry Carol

"Her Ladyship wanted the portrait to have a more contemporary look."

Coronation Civil Rights

'Having a lot of underlings doesn't make you an overling!'

"Sire, the auditors are in the counting house."

'No need to put my details in darlin'... You're the girl for me!'

"No land women want me, so I'm off to try my hand in the sea."

"If we finance your army will you promise not to attack the bank?"

"I'm looking for someone who werjt23609ui45y7ijopgreop[yt thinks it's cute that cat ran across the keys and I left it in."

'Yes Sir, we do believe 'the customer is king', but that doesn't give you the right to deduct a 'Peasant's Tax' from your bill!'

'There's no business like show business.'

'I still don't know how you got a booking here Bryan.'

"An assortment of severed plant genitalia. Is there a subtext I should be aware of?"

Cupid with an arrow machine gun

'I know she's not much to look at, but neither are you!'

'Quiet desperation -- that's the best kind.'

"When a man sends ten thousand troops to attack you, it means he has a crush on you."

Child playing king.

Sedan chair has fluffy dice in it.

"Look! - Bloody sponging foreigners...."

'Of course the crime rate is down, dummy -- you legalized everything!'

"Oh... Was that you knocking?"