Quirky Quotes Enthusiast Gifts

"If all you have is a whatchamacallit then every problem looks like a thingamajig."

"My older self travels back just to remind me to put the cap back on this pen?"

Mister Bundles VS. The Martians - Party Twenty Three

"You don't know me well enough to not care how I look."

Cow talking to dog: 'What...You eat your own...?!'

'If he could trace the matching sock I've another 25 or 30 to account for.'

"Why the gumboots? Well, I can't stand slimy things touching my feet..."

My parents ate New York and all I got was this stupid t-shirt

Overshadowed by the Tony's: Broadway's Lesser Known Awards

"Always take the bull firmly by the tail and look him directly in the eye..."

Armed dogs wait for hot dog vendor.

"I now pronounce you a partial place setting."

'I'm not sure which I like best - the fake fire or the fake man with brandy glass in front of it.'

Football Crazy strip six

'No, I didn't know it was hunting season - why do you ask?'

Jars containing a Brain and a Brain Fart.

"Your animal companionship is here!"

God with Earth Controller

"I'm a monster."

Cheesie Rider

"May you love like you've never been hurt, dance like no one is watching, and chase squirrels at the speed of light."

Plant Parenthood...

"Overkill, dude."

The Frankenstein snowman.

'Not only do we have no natural enemies we have no natural friends.'

'They said 'write what you know.' So I didn't write anything.'

'The meat of their order is coming up.'

"The usual."

Tasty.

'With this organ transplant, you may find yourself doing a lot of thinking with your heart,'

'I didn't know it was a one-trip salad bar!'

"Oh, I don't do the test myself Sir: Doctor Vampire does it..."

"I hope he's wearing pants."

Snorkeling: A Dollar A Minute

"Rob is a functioning train wreck."