Quirky Quotes Admirer Gifts

Salesmen: If you can fit inside, we'll buy something.

"My older self travels back just to remind me to put the cap back on this pen?"

Sign: 'Welcome to Fernbanks. Beneath our quaint Norman Rockwell-ish exterior beats a big-box chain store heart, ready to sell out at the drop of a hat.'

I like this one. Do you have it in blue?

"Our bond is stronger because we chose each other."

"You know the stories about putting a pair of socks into the washing machine and getting out just one of them...Jones, it seems that we found the hideaway of the second socks!"

"Always take the bull firmly by the tail and look him directly in the eye..."

Football Crazy strip six

'How do you like my new 'Blend with the Background' skin?'

No one knew it, but Gerald was about to execute what he called 'The Move.'"

'No, you can't have a stick of Llanfairpwllgwyngyllgogerrychwrudobwllanstisiliogogogoch rock. I'll get you on in Rhyl.'

"Rob is a functioning train wreck."

Cell phones seem as if they are designed for a T-Rex!

Giant Sale!

'I've discovered a talking amoeba!' '2+2=4, 5-4=1, 93=3.' SMASH 'I wanted to get it before it multiplied.'

"You get your hair from your father's side..."

"If all you have is a whatchamacallit then every problem looks like a thingamajig."

"What a coincidence! I enjoy sleeping and running around the house for no reason, too."

"I can never go metric. 'Al's 30.48 Centimeter Hot Dogs' just doesn't sound right."

'It's a new concept, the inside out house.'

'What's wrong with you?'

This is a voice recognition service...we reserve the right to cut you off if you have an irritating nasal sort of voice.

A mad scientist.

'Now THAT'S what I call a love seat!'

You are the 1 I settled 3

"It's all good – but some of it is better."

'Naw, man! I ain't never worked in no animal hospital...'

Dog With Extravagant Face Mask

Clydesdale never misses a beat.

Noah's lesser known brother.

'Don't be silly - I love you for your body AND your tiny little brain!'

'It's yet another customer survey asking about our last oil change. Was it poor, fair, very good, blissful or orgasmic?'

Jungle dweller swings from outhouse with toilet paper stuck to his foot.

Why do we have pistols? I thought we were back-to-back to see who is taller!

Hoppers leave Luke's Pub at the end of Hoppy Hour.