Quirky Quote Enthusiast Pillows

'My fault?! You're the one who said, 'Give him enough rope and he'll hang himself.''

Cow talking to dog: 'What...You eat your own...?!'

"You don't know me well enough to not care how I look."

'If he could trace the matching sock I've another 25 or 30 to account for.'

"Why the gumboots? Well, I can't stand slimy things touching my feet..."

Overshadowed by the Tony's: Broadway's Lesser Known Awards

My parents ate New York and all I got was this stupid t-shirt

Football Crazy strip six

'I'm not sure which I like best - the fake fire or the fake man with brandy glass in front of it.'

'No, I didn't know it was hunting season - why do you ask?'

Armed dogs wait for hot dog vendor.

"I'm a monster."

"Your animal companionship is here!"

Cheesie Rider

"May you love like you've never been hurt, dance like no one is watching, and chase squirrels at the speed of light."

God with Earth Controller

"Overkill, dude."

The Frankenstein snowman.

'Not only do we have no natural enemies we have no natural friends.'

'They said 'write what you know.' So I didn't write anything.'

"Rob is a functioning train wreck."

Mummy Shrink.

'I didn't know it was a one-trip salad bar!'

"The usual."

'I'm just curious, which one of you was dropped off by their boyfriend on a really fast motorcycle?'

"I'm an ass is half-full kind of donkey."

"I hope he's wearing pants."

"Oh, I don't do the test myself Sir: Doctor Vampire does it..."

Tasty.

Snorkeling: A Dollar A Minute