Quirky Optometrist T-Shirts

Opticians.

"I've had these glasses since I was a kid, when my doctor told me I'd grow into them..."

'You don't have a heart murmur, but your liver is muttering.'

9 out of 10 doctors recommend keeping their stethoscopes in the freezer.

"Let's just start cutting and see what happens."

"Hiya, hiya, hiya, guy. I'm the bluebird of Prozac."

'Gee, Doc - couldn't you just use a rubber mallet to check my reflexes?'

"And more intriguingly, your prognosis differs depending on which search engine I use."

'I can't wait for a generic version of eyes of newts to come out.'

'Transylvania's most famous Optometrist 'Count Macula'.

"The Help Desk guy says to try Ctrl-Alt-Delete....!"

"9 out of 10 doctors recommend keeping their stethoscopes in the freezer."

The Big Book of Really Hard Surgery

A Mom and Pop Operation

'Eureka! It won't cure anything, but the side effects are terrific!'

'Just relax Mr Benson. I find having background music while I perform surgery helps me focus!'

Voyeurs guide to the Cosmos (stars in the shape of a sexy woman).

Preserved head and mobile phone.

Plastic Surgery

"My Doctor said I needed more exercise so I jogged down to the donut shop."

"He certainly brings a new dimension to keyhole surgery!"

'You're not my usual doctor.'

St Berts - Britain's first open mouth surgery in progress.

'How do these glasses feel?'

Cyclops reading an eye chart

'The problem isn't your high definition television, it's your low definition eyes.'

Surgeon with hearts on his shirt.

Sewing for Dummies.

Dr. Potato Head

"This is the only spectacle frame that fits your special needs, sir."

Man uses his eye-doctor's chart for a word-search.

'I was skeptical at first, but it really works.'

Analphabet