Quirky Marriage Enthusiast Pillows

'We were married on the 9th on the 18th.'

'We have a beautiful relationship. Why spoil it with a hug?'

'Well, he actually behaved pretty well for the first few minutes of the wedding ceremony....'

Try Mediation

"You don't whisper anymore."

',,, and if anyone knows of a reason why these two should not be married, let them storm this castle with pitchforks and torches or forever hold their peace,'

'I now pronounce you man and wife, you now may kiss you sweet little bachelor butt goodbye.'

'....Till death do you part, don't say I didn't warn you.'

As long as there are husbands, we'll get our's money's worth!

"You'll have to excuse my date. He spontaneously combusts from time to time."

"I'm sorry, Arthur. I've decided to secede from our marriage."

Storage Unit of Love

'In sickness and in health, under affordable health care or unaffordable. . .'

'No, there isn't a probationary period!'

So all is not rosy in the garden?

Woman finds sensitive mechanic to date.

'Well, you know what they say about opposite's attracting...'

"It's about time you finished the wall, Herbet...that's your problem, you never finish anything you start!"

"Happy anniversary, dear. How about a second honeymoon?" "Sure. Who with?"

"I'm the lot of baggage he comes with."

'It started with between-meal snacks -- now he's having between-snack noshes.'

Mrs Cat waiting for Mr Cat coming home late.

"Hang on, I'll get him for you."

"I'm gona level with you, Judith, I've spent some time in the pen."

'Looks like the doctor confirmed my diagnosis. It's not just your bowel. Everything about you is irritable.'

"I find myself strangely attracted to you."

'You disgust me; but I like it.'

"I now pronounce you a joint return."

Apply to marry multi-marriage failure.

"I love marriage...It's my husband I hate."

"... and don't forget to clean out the garage and attic... and the gutters need to be..." "Put a sock in it, Sally. You knew I wasn't an eager beaver when you married me."

'...I now pronounce you man and wife, for whatever that's worth these days.'

Gender Symbols