Quirky Kitchen Scientist Gifts

'We've done all we can, but these beans... *sunglasses* ...Have expired.'

On August 14, 2011 at app. 2:00 p, Derek Winslow made scientific history by converting an item of the animal kingdom into an item of the plant kingdom.

"Milk, butter, bread - all past the expiration date. either he just hadn't noticed before, or his time machine worked."

'I have to agree -- the value of pie goes on indefinitely.'

I don't know what happened to the poor guy, but he's visibly shaken.

'Mom! Dad's eating my science fair project!'

"Give my compliments to the Biotech industry"

Doctor uses thermometer to check chicken.

Culinary surgery.

'Hard or soft science?'

"You sure you don't want any Pi?"

'You can't call it a miracle drug just because you added miracle whip!'

'Just add eggs. That sounds easy.'

If Einstein had worked in Fast Food

"Who wants to help Grandma make her famous gingerbread man cookies? You kids get the flour, eggs, and sugar, and I'll get the protoplasm and epithelial tissue."

At the Periodic Picnic Table of the Elements

"No, I'm not the waiter. I'm the genetic engineer. How would you like your lamb?"

'Ooops! No got that wrong, those two chemicals should never be mixed...'

'This old VCR warms a mean bagel.'

'Well, that's the last of the garlic repellent.'

The History of Anti-stick

Man eating his meal with his feet.

'If that's the way he feels about chemistry, there's no harm done.'

Under strict laboratory conditions extensive research proves that, despite being watched, pots do eventually boil.

"Mmm....say, cookie! What's this garbage you're feeding us?"

Molecular gastronomy.

Einstein tests his pasta-antipasto theory.

"I don't know if it was the peanut butter and mayonnaise sandwich or the pickle milkshake I had for lunch!"

'The biochemist at work' The biochemist at lunch'.

Those four microwave dings you just heard indicate that dinner is ready, Lance. Hop to it! Unlike some individuals I know, I am not one of Pavlov's wolverines.

Chef using an electric train to roll pastry.

Five seconds before the first turducken.

'You've got to be kidding...you mean there's a recipe for this?'

'I just have time to make some toast, analyze its particle sizes, its density, its chemisorption...'

"Well, we went through the fruit and veg, and thought we should try something more exotic - like the space-time continuum."