Quirky Kitchen Gadget Enthusiast T-Shirts

'This old VCR warms a mean bagel.'

'Well, of course it's a toaster. There's no law that says it has to be a crystal ball.'

"....Oh, and the dog's eaten all the fridge magnets."

GMOs: The Next Generation

"Still haven't quite figured out the pressure cooker, huh dad?"

F&E Subs. Hey, you replaced the little swords with periscope-shaped toothpicks! Nice touch, Ernie!

'And a special feature on this model is the diet ice cubes.'

"Wow! The big guy! And what kind of B.T.U.s am I looking at here?"

"Doctor. I am speechless"

'He'll do the dishes now that I've attached an accelerator.'

'Beat 3,000 eggs and add one quart of 10-30W oil? So much for putting my recipes on the computer.'

'And it comes with oven mitts, butter, sour cream and chives.'

Bread maker, coffee maker, tea maker, pasta maker.

Patent Office: ". . . It's a phoneless cord."

'Drat - the water purifier is on backwards.'

Tin Opening

Mankind's earliest ancestor emerges from the primordial ooze, closely followed by a prehistoric species of re-sealable plastic containers.

"The toaster is sueing the sandwich maker over custody of the bread..."

The Welsh Rarebit Mchine

'All the money we saved buying bulk food on sale we blew on this huge freezer!'

Spiro & Pusho mincing fish in meat mincer.

Swiss Kitchen

'Well, that's the last of the garlic repellent.'

Pocket Knife Food Processor

"Butt cracker"

Motor-blender.

"Here's our everything's included meal kit. How do they stuff a cook and dishwasher in there?"

'And exactly where did you find the 'antique salami slicer'?'

"I swear- the next one of you that beeps at me is gonna be sorry."

'I don't know if artificial intelligence in a toaster is a good thing. It just seems to make toast whenever it feels like it.'

"For your birthday, I got you a food processor!"

"Jean-Pierre, homemade caviar for table six, please!"

"Look what I found on sale! Measuring cups to use for all your recipes!"

Archeology Exhibit. When sifting through landfills, future archeologists will identify the immediate post-pandemic period by the abundant, discarded bread makers.

'You do realize that from now on every single oven in every kitchen in this country will have to be replaced?'