Quirky Item Admirer Gifts

Gravestone Epitaph - 'One surreal gag too far.'

Lactose Intolerant

Raincloud Umbrella

"....Oh, and the dog's eaten all the fridge magnets."

"Trust me, this is as weird for me as it is for you."

Ball as water-melon.

I like this one. Do you have it in blue?

"You know the stories about putting a pair of socks into the washing machine and getting out just one of them...Jones, it seems that we found the hideaway of the second socks!"

Football Crazy strip six

'How do you like my new 'Blend with the Background' skin?'

No one knew it, but Gerald was about to execute what he called 'The Move.'"

"You get your hair from your father's side..."

"Rob is a functioning train wreck."

Giant Sale!

Slow moving and small brained were already two strikes. . . but many experts agree that the unfortunate stripe pattern was the main reason for the extinction of the Cerebex.

'It's a new concept, the inside out house.'

'What's wrong with you?'

He'll never melt. I made him from fast food milkshakes.

A mad scientist.

HAPPY HOUR 4:30-5:30, 'Oh, the prices don't change -- we just serve the beer in cartoon-character glasses.'

'First, let me apologize for suggesting you throw horseshoes as therapy.'

Dog With Extravagant Face Mask

'It's yet another customer survey asking about our last oil change. Was it poor, fair, very good, blissful or orgasmic?'

"You know that thing where you stand like a statue, then move real fast, then stand like a statue again? You totally stole that from me."

Rocket charmer.

Man with big furry mustache drives car with grill that looks like same.

"I can't help you with your chronic whistling. You don't need a psychiatrist, you need a musicologist!"

The Neighbours from Hell....

Welcome centre

The Reclusive Flying Hell Rat

'It's my favorite Christmas gift - a wireless computer mouse that looks just like my old fountain pen!'

'Of course it's efficient - it's a flowchart.'

'Well, Dear, if you must roam about the house dressed as a chicken, that's fine, but please close the drapes when you do!'

"I'm a funny little person so I'm looking to adopt a funny little dog. Do you have one?"

London Fly-Paper Vendor