Quirky Guest T-Shirts

'Oh I can't stay here, i'm allergic to shell fish.'

Indian rajah rowing elephant in a monsoon flood.

The Euro-Trash Trashcan

"How fresh is the calamari?"

The city of San Francisco switches from cable cars to satellite dish at a cost of only $79.99 a month for the first six months.

"Off my back and out of the sack. Let's unpack and have a snack!"

'Now Featuring Gas-Fired Microwave Campfires!'

The Hall Of Mirrors Jeretski Palace, Plovdo

Beware of the Dog Hair.

'Why, thank you. When they started the vineyard five generations ago, I heard they were shooting for freakin' awesome.'

"I want to be a more interesting person. Think maybe watching old black and white movies would do it?"

Introducing Piza Island.

'Nobody ever before had took much notice of Granny's homemade flour-sack bloomers.'

'I like scientists: They are genuinely interested in every mundane thing we do and keep detailed records...'

"Excuse me ma'am, may I help you cross the road so that I can get the answer to this dumb joke my friend keeps telling?"

'I thought that 'remote gizmo' was just for manoeuvring the caravan down the drive!'

"Frankly, I never would've figured you for an S.U.V. person."

Fall on a desert island

Public footpath on a desert island.

'If it 'tells' the time, why do I have to look at it?'

'I'm not a magician, but I do keep live doves in my pants.'

"When will I be old enough to have an inner child?"

"The saving grace of living with someone who has AD/HD is that any arguments you have over it never last very long."

"I feel like I'm cosplaying as a salad bar."

Giraffe Selfie

Lavatory Waterfall

Climate change

"It was rated on all the travel websites. 'Best economy tour'."

Thumbing a Lift.

Ostrich Curoisities

Penguin Remote

'I've decided to put off college, and hitchhike around the cat.'