Quirky Giver Gifts

"Is this tax deductible?"

'Here you go, kid! A worm.'

"Cheers! Well, this is exciting. I've never had a dinner date with a duck before." "Relax, honey. I'm just here for the bread."

Lactose Intolerant

"All natural snow cones for sale."

'So where do you think pineapple juice comes from?'

"The following programme contains scenes of a very noisy vacuum cleaner."

Mighty Man Of Justice Goes Christmas Shopping Part 1

God putting the finishing touches to the Pug.

Cheeze Wiz.

A golden Big Boy holding a plate of poop

E-vac-u-ate! E-vac-u-ate! . . . I've just farted. . ."

'Take my tip,sonny and say it with jelly babies.'

Easter Island Cheeseheads

All bets are off as Round One begins in the "Dollars versus Donuts" World Championship title fight.

Excess Baggage: Some people take getting away from it all very seriously.

'They help with my nicotine patch addiction.'

Ball as water-melon.

A watch face with Stonehenge

"And at no extra charge I can give your old suit a Viking funeral."

'Powdery stuff? Oh, that's egg substitute, from the Vegan lobby.'

You don't need to believe EVERYTHING you are told.

"Happy Anniversary, dear! It's a gold spray-painted macaroni necklace."

"'How We Die' - fabulous!"

'We have three minutes left.'

"It's my home grown quail call. Quail don't come when I blow it, but cows sure do."

'It's another corporate lawyer...do we want to buy a soul?'

Diner

Fly fishing.

Whittling a forget-me-not moose for the one you adore...

Christmas Presents.

A Crash-test Dummy child about to have a ride on a car crash test ride in a shopping centre mall.

"Waiter, this is the worst meal I've ever tasted. And believe me, I've eaten some crap!"

Where Deviled Eggs come from

Kissing the Fish