Quirky Executive T-Shirts

Cat Boss

'As you may know, I'll retire in a few weeks but you better not think that I'm a lame duck now!'

"Damn it, Bershire, I've told you to never call me when I'm in my executive ball pit!"

'Ah, Galagher, we made good use of your proposal.'

'That large, rolled up newspaper is a reminder - mess up in this office and you'll pay the price.'

Ice Cream And Summer Rentals

Armstrong? Why did UPS just deliver a microscope, a robotic arm, a huge incubator, a nucleus extractor and a dozen lab rats? Well, it's certainly not so I can replace you with an army of clones programmed to work for free. Well

"He's actually my co-counsel, but you may scratch his head."

'Tomorrow's special is fish, so wear the flounder suit.'

"Or we could raise your profile by coming out with that pimple on the end of your nose."

'Must really be a terrible headache you've got there, Doctor.'

'This is impressive, Roberts, but I'm not sure that it qualifies as work-place leadership.'

"Okay...tell me again what training seminar we sent Bill to?"

"That's Arnie, our resident meeting moth. He doesn't have an office... Just flits all day from one meeting to another. And be careful: he's got a thing for wool!"

"I don't consider a missing four million dollars to be 'monkeyshines'."

Boy in toy car talking on phone.

"My favorite tea: hot daffodil-infused chamomile with a hint of whiskey. Are you serious? Of course I'm serious! I've been dosing myself with small quantities of poisonous daffodil ever since 1931. You have to build up an immunity if you want to survive in the cutthroat world of Scrabble tournaments."

"Good news, chief, a computer virus destroyed all our documents."

Office: Empowerment Drawer.

'Interesting. At first, I didn't pick her as dominant.' - Child chairs meeting at Toys Inc.

Joint Ventures!

"Jenkins, come in and pull up a bean bag."

"My mommy suggested I try a different advertising approach."

"Saturn. No contest. A deadly, treacherous gas giant ringed by a gossamer halo of ice. It symbolizes both death and life. Both evil and good. It symbolizes existence itself."

"And when conventional theories don't work, we've got Charnier here to do us a spot of voodoo marketing."

"The boss is the fatherly type. He never fires anybody."

"Ah, Stevens—sit anywhere."

'What's our stockbroker doing in the shower? Quick! Run and get me a rolled up copy of the Wall Street Journal!'

"No more Dr Nice guy"

"Would someone dim the lights? I'm about to launch into the paranoid and conspiratorial portion of my report."

Self-Employment

"However, should the need arise at Cyber-Biogenetics, for a trusty sidekick, we have your resume on file."

Setting up companies

"I've built this business up from scratch. . . "

'The action next week is going to be in bird seed, but if you quote me, I'll deny I said it.'