Quirky Diagnosticians T-Shirts

Man tapping a tuning fork on another man's knee

'...I already have 26 cats, why not 27...'

"Has it occurred to you that you keep getting beaten up because that's your true purpose in life?"

9 out of 10 doctors recommend keeping their stethoscopes in the freezer.

'You don't have a heart murmur, but your liver is muttering.'

"Let's just start cutting and see what happens."

'Your test results are in - and here's a first, the Lab Techs have asked to meet you.'

"Hiya, hiya, hiya, guy. I'm the bluebird of Prozac."

'Gee, Doc - couldn't you just use a rubber mallet to check my reflexes?'

You're making me very angry right now, Al. Did you know that before Rorschach came up with his inkblot test, he had one that involved blood spatters?

Quick! 5-second rule!

"And more intriguingly, your prognosis differs depending on which search engine I use."

"I'd say it's a fungal infection."

A Mom and Pop Operation

The Big Book of Really Hard Surgery

'Eureka! It won't cure anything, but the side effects are terrific!'

"My Doctor said I needed more exercise so I jogged down to the donut shop."

"And how long have you had this superiority complex?"

'I'm worried, Master has suddenly developed a morbid obsession: He asks me to play dead all the time now...'

I understand about the body parts, but did you have to put me in hand-me-down clothes?!

Preserved head and mobile phone.

'I think I've found what's causing your funny buzzing sound.'

Plastic Surgery

While singing the popular song, Clay was disturbed to discover that his thigh bone wasn't connected to his hip bone, that it was, in fact, connected to nothing.

"He certainly brings a new dimension to keyhole surgery!"

'You're not my usual doctor.'

Saturday was fantasy dysfunctional relationship day.

Doctors' Tour

Obstetrician's office: Innies and Outies.

St Berts - Britain's first open mouth surgery in progress.

"Give it to me nuanced, Doc."

Sewing for Dummies.

"With symptoms like yours, you could be the next Batman!"

Quasimodo visits his doctor - "I'm afraid you have Tinnitus!"

"His baldness was way out ofcontrol, so we had to put him into a medically induced comb-over."