Quirky Coach T-Shirts

'They're both great quarterbacks, but I chose Matt as my starter because he's dating a celebrity!'

Clown teaches how to speak Jibberish

'That large, rolled up newspaper is a reminder - mess up in this office and you'll pay the price.'

"He's actually my co-counsel, but you may scratch his head."

'Home Schooling'

'Must really be a terrible headache you've got there, Doctor.'

'This is impressive, Roberts, but I'm not sure that it qualifies as work-place leadership.'

"Okay...tell me again what training seminar we sent Bill to?"

"I don't consider a missing four million dollars to be 'monkeyshines'."

"I think I see a miscreant in the carpark. There's no time to call the police I must deal with it myself."

Joint Ventures!

"Jenkins, come in and pull up a bean bag."

Melvin likes to indulge his inner child.

'We'll talk later, Ed, but for now we have a quick and dirty solution to your objections.'

3 Pointless Things To Do At Christmas: Add a little festivity to your favourite fast food/Look up an old friend/Murder the Scotch.

'Stick and Carrot Business Incentive Consultants.'

"The boss is the fatherly type. He never fires anybody."

"Ah, Stevens—sit anywhere."

"Good to have you aboard. Now, let's meet some of the oddballs weirdos and eccentrics you'll be working with."

Self-Employment

"My doctor told me I should start working out."

Skier.

"However, should the need arise at Cyber-Biogenetics, for a trusty sidekick, we have your resume on file."

'Thanks for making it guys. Come on in and pull up a chair.' A square hole in an office floor where chairs can be pulled up from

"No more Dr Nice guy"

"Would someone dim the lights? I'm about to launch into the paranoid and conspiratorial portion of my report."

The team wondered if he would ever fit in.

'Dad demonstrates for an hour and then we go home - what happens in your swimming lessons?'

'A resume painted in oils on canvas? How long have you been out of work?'

Benjamin Franklin

'Now THIS is my idea of a creative department.'

'Bancroft, it's time to pay the salesmen their bonuses. Would you please stop at the butchers' shop and get a few pounds of raw meat?'

'Think Basics.'

"He doesn't like dinosaurs."