Quirky Cartoon Admirer Pillows

"Don't panic Daisy dear. You can relax your buttocks, it's not the vet, it's the chimney sweep."

"That was a good adaptation."

'Even my emotional baggage is leather.'

"There goes ol' Casper - he got thrown out of the house for 'thinking outside the box', if you know what I mean."

'Know where I might be able to score some electrolytes?'

"Looks like another hit-and-run inspector..."

"I call shotgun."

"Sorry I'm late: I was hitching a ride but when the driver noticed me, he panicked and we had an accident..."

101 uses of a dead cat: kite.

Kevin's concerns over horsemeat in the beefburgers evaporated when he passed the frozen fish cabinet.

Eye Bank.

'That was more than just a friendly squeeze!'

'Who tipped you off about our expulsion?'

'No, I haven't seen your father - what does he look like?'

'Dawkins, who did you say stopped by while I was out?'

'Could you direct me to the nearest alcoholics anonymous?'

'There he goes over the bag limit again!'

'Stop, identity thief!'

OK, I'm a little shallow, but I'm meaningful.

'I'm the alpha angel.'

"First tofu of the season!"

Therapist's Swatter

"Umm, excuse me, but my eyes are up here, here, and a bunch around here."

"Face it, Edwin—it isn't that we've all turned into teddy bears, it's that you're going crazy!"

Sanitation Dept. Recycle. Trust me, it's best not to look too closely in Dr. Frankenstein's recycling bins!

Skeleton playing fetch.

Christmas in the Fish Bowl

Social Distancing Club

"Do you do much walking?"

"Whose the new guy?"

A Snowman checking out some products for blacken his teeth

"Wait! I don't want to be disease resistant!"

'It's one of the candidates for baptism. Wants to know if he can hold the hand that shook Elvis's hand above the water.'

Get back in that locker room! Go on - scat! ... Anyone else forget to wash his hands?'

'Incidentally, our health insurance has limited eye coverage.'