Quilt Queen Gifts

Pin Cushion to roll of cotton: 'Hi! I'm a pin cushion! I love my job!' Pin Cushion's reply: 'MASOCHIST!'

'All right, who sewed in the disposable diaper?'

"Yo, Eunice – don’t leave me hangin’."

Man with 'Real Ale' written on t-shirt, woman with 'Real Pine' written on rolling pin

"Bed Spread"

'It's labour-saving because with this you'll be able to burn my meals much faster!'

I love embroidery

'Anybody for breakfast?'

Curtsey

Von Trapp family masks

Sew on a sequin!

Crotchet

'My mom bakes from scratch -- she's a full-service mom.'

'I've got another loose tooth - It's not your cooking is it mum?'

Granny Wear

Quilt fanatic

Great Moments in Computer History: Betsy Ross sews the first bar code.

'Aside from your plastic canvas projects, what else have you been doing since you retired?'

Quilting Bee.

One young wife asking another if she finds it more economical to do her own cooking.

Mum's Baking is best!

'Wear them on thanksgiving instead.'

Genealogical picture of Mr. Punch.

How scrapbookers see progress. ('I've been scrapbooking for ten years and I've got two pages done already!' 'Wow, you're fast!')

"If you get chilly, use that crazy quilt."

'...and another thing. You're very selfish.'

A second life for Grandma's quilt.

'Sorry.'

'If you get chilly, use that crazy quilt.'

A granny tortoise with a quilted shell.

"It's a lot of work, but a quilt lasts forever."

"I can quit whenever I want to."

'There's already an aids quilt... the committee thought it would be a good idea if the club made a syphilis quilt.'

"Have you ever considered changing careers Mom?"

"It's not cotton, honey. It's nylon quilted to polyester. The leaves and trim are twenty per cent acrylic and eighty per cent modacrylic, and the flowers are acetate. The backing is polypropylene. Go to bed."