Quick-fix Explorers Gifts

Acme Tummy Flattening Kit

"Hey, the neighbors just installed a new wifi router."

A tube of toothpaste doesn't reach its full potential until in the hands of a baby.

Introducing... The Everything Else Morning-After Pill!

"Wa-wa. . . wa-wa. . . wa-wa. . ."

'I don't know about the ecosystem, but the economy seems to be on the upswing.'

Giraffe Selfie

The Desert Island Package

"Charles, look! He’s sending his first text!"

'Looks like this part of the beach has been claimed.'

Student to kid: 'School first, then Mount Everest.'

"Shall I kiss it better?"

"She thinks it's a touchscreen."

'I feel much safer living in a gated community.'

"In 200 cubits, right-turn, then stay on the current road..."

The Shy Nudist Camp.

Planet of the Ants

Headphone swing

'Now let's call and see what time it is in CHINA!'

I can be upgraded, can you?

"I did a quick search for my lost requirements documents and I found them right away, but how do I get rid of the ads now?"

"With the wearing of this mystic talisman, you will never be plagued by any of the minor ailments usually handled by over-the-counter drugs!"

'Excellent meeting. I loved the quick fixes, the simple solutions, and the easy answers.'

"What we really need is a long term quick fix."

Family separated by the Internet

'If these are the best years, can you imagine the crap that's coming?'

"Ambitions... to stand on my own two feet."

'Diet? Exercise... can't you just operate?'

'That's the worst case of rising damp I've ever seen!'

'Let's beat it before he realizes he's eating our decoy!'

"Dudes - we should make the last booby trap a giant bowling ball!"