Quick-fix Thinker Gifts

Gracie tries and fails to sleep on Christmas Eve.

"Yeah, but that one's a little bit hard to reach."

It would be a painful forty five minutes before Arthur finally admitted he left his presentation at home.

"Don't you just hate restaurants that make you feel rushed?"

Introducing... The Everything Else Morning-After Pill!

"Can you hypnotise me into being in shape?"

'I'm a bit pressed for time. Give me your one-minute elevator pitch.'

Tonite: Gala Costume Party. Got your costume for the big party? No, I'll just part my hair on the other side and go as my own reflection.

"Can you hurry up with that will? I don't have all day."

"Baseball is way too boring - so, we're doing one inning, winner takes all, everybody go home early and live their lives."

'That's nothing...I've been told my wig takes fifteen years off me.'

Man using an entrance canopy as an umbrella

"I want the contract to say that if we win a championship of any sort, no one spills champagne on my head."

"Shall I kiss it better?"

'Our new multi-syringe will take care of all your allergies in one fell swoop.'

"With the wearing of this mystic talisman, you will never be plagued by any of the minor ailments usually handled by over-the-counter drugs!"

'Excellent meeting. I loved the quick fixes, the simple solutions, and the easy answers.'

"What we really need is a long term quick fix."

'Please sir - all of them!'

Run. Freeze. Run again! Turn around. Run! No, freeze!

'Your tests indicate that you have a very short attention span -- you should be either a short-order cook or a news anchorman.'

"I'll drill a hole in the side and we'll be FREE!!"

Working with Hahnium, which has a half-life of 35 seconds.

'Diet? Exercise... can't you just operate?'

'Look, Doctor. I just want him cured. I'm not interested in what's wrong with him, so skip the lab work."

"On the contrary, Hank, I believe that in some cases, slapping a band-aid on a problem is a VERY effective solution!"

"The job is very stressful. You'll be expected to think fast, talk loud, and parallel park in heavy traffic."

"We'll get that infected tear duct fixed up in no time."

Walkies.

'Quick, Bensonhurst-Shaw, I need a bon mot for today's meeting.'

Acme Tummy Flattening Kit

Ed uses comb-overs on his bald spots.

Paramedic running after dropped stretcher.

Think fast!

Recording. You need to talk faster. We only have sixty seconds to record the side effects for this pharmaceutical commercial.