Queue Jester Gifts

Test your patience, back in one hour.

"Another week another dollar, Jenkins"

Tennis fans queuing at Wimbledon.

'A representative will be with you in twelve minutes... so, if you have to go to the bathroom, please go now...'

Twenty years later, Kim turns the tables on her loathsome former English teacher.

Ski kicker.

Show Jumping Tantrums

"Seven bookings and four sendings off, and that was just in the queue for pies."

"Two minutes, 40 seconds. Next ... Two minutes, 53 seconds. Next ..."

'Just a minute, I forgot something.'

Thanks TSA

Time-Off Coupons

Congestion Eases Inexplicably

"If there are more than two people in front of you - we will open another superstore."

Late entry in the Hop, Skip and Jump event!

"We'd like to begin by boarding all passengers who feel impatient."

"Hey, you can't cut in line like that! - Who do you think you are?"

'Your glaucoma will never improve this way, Buzzy.'

'You'll have to excuse her - being on hold with Disneyland Paris has sent her goofy...'

10 items or less queue. (Woman has thrown eggs onto floor).

"Over, damn you, over!"

'And press nine if you are loosing the will to live!'

The health dept. begins psychological audits...'And last summer at the bank, when the line was moving very slowly, you started shouting. What was that about?'

Supermarket traffic lights.

Line Forms Here / Line Ends Here.

'You're breathing out deliberately!'

"O.K., one at a time, step forward and say, 'That's it, lady - you've blocked your last escalator.' "

Our menu has changed. To hear this message again, press 1. To hang up, press 2.

A long wait

"Go. The sign has a bigger impact when someone's just sitting there."

'Uh - oh... it seems the cashout queue was really long today...'

"Mr. Jones, the doctor says it's OK to move you ahead of the queue and he'll see you now!"

I've had four espresso shots and a red bull. Look out post office, here comes Sadie! Post office? You're fueling up so you have the strength to endure the long lines? Ha. I'm creating the lines. I get to the counter with a stack of complicated questions, then watch the people behind me go nuts with frustration! Bwah-ha-ha-ha!!! One of the best maniacal laughs in the business.

Domino Toppling Championship

"Wish me luck, I'm off to the shops to join the socially distanced queues..."