Queer Humor Lover Pillows

Adam and Adam

"No, it wasn't a sinkhole. Your old TV was so heavy the ground could no longer take the weight."

Gifts for a cloned baby!

"You left this on our ship."

"We have to take that science away from Tommy...he's genetically modified the cat!"

'Tiddles has left everything to an old folks' home.'

"Fresh pepper?"

Astral Projection

"Sorry sir - the self-propelling pencils have all just walked out..."

"And that's General Ambrose T. Spangler. He died in the Great Mustache Fire of 1897."

"You're hogging the covers again!"

'I wouldn't kick her out of bed.'

Andy Oxidant meets Free Radical.

"No monsters, but there's a tear in the carpeting and I see hardwood!"

"My dream is to have a little house and a white picket fence wired with explosives."

'So,,,apparently you're really a dude,'

'Can I have flies with that'

"Yes, alright! I know it's a small mountain... I'm only a novice oracle."

Newark by Night. A new Dutch restaurant just opened. What do you know about Dutch cuisine? Nothing. But I'm a big fan of the "Dutch Treat" concept.

"Doctor - at home I get this nagging pain... what do you recommend?"

"Not tonight. The furniture is sentient again."

"Daddy is off to work in a data mine."

"Honk if you love me!"

'Adam, you left the toilet rock up again!'

"John, wake up, I think the mattress has stopped breathing."

He wanted a different one.

'It's a giant inkblot on loan from the psychiatrist who owns the unit next door.'

So You've Cloned Yourself

'Sorry, but my car is a hybrid and I wouldn't accept anything less in a husband.'

“It’s the only way we can get him to kiss her.”

Updated fairy tales - "Cinderella." Dating Service. It's not often we get a client looking for a specific shoe size.

'Well, somebody on this stupid little planet ordered an extra-large with pepperoni and mushrooms!'

Litter Tray Stonehenge

"Barnes is morphing into some kind of strange creature. I warned him about eating out of the vending machines."

Toenail clipping missile.