Quantum Captain T-Shirts

A Higgs Bosun

"I think I've figured out why we can't find the marina."

Captain in a storm

Leadership in the Covid-19 Era

"An un-observed universe ceases to exist. Yeah right!"

For some reason, "The Road Less Travelled" GPS package never really caught on...

'If we get out of this alive, I'm going to have a darn good look at your resume.'

"Sorry, Rick, but no thongs means no thongs."

Man about dog parasailing: 'He's a water dog and a birder.'

'Well, it wasn't my lucky day... first there was that shark and then I bimped into a bunch of beaver!'

Welsh airport arrivals.

Captain looks out of a porthole and notices that the ship is sinking.

'Trust me, you're not going to need an alarm clock.'

'I like to greet the new team members myself.'

"Have I complimented you on marketing's renewed team spirit?"

"I might have to go to school forever because the more I know the more I know I don't know."

"This crew gets 15 miles to the pound of gruel. They're very fuel efficient."

"The Captain really, really hates losing at shuffleboard."

"Scientists confirmed today that everything we know about the structure of the universe is wrongedy-wrong-wrong."

It became increasingly difficult for the captain to reward his crew and still maintain his ferocious reputation.

"How can you feel queasy, we're barely out of port."

Captain Ahab (Ret.)

"All right, pal, I'm just saying, that's what I'd do if it was my Large Hadron Collider."

'I was working on developing anti-matter under laboratory conditions, but I couldn't find anything to keep it in.'

"It's an interdimensional portal that can facilitate travel across both space and time... but we mostly use it for storage."

'Captain, there's someone pissing in the hold!'

"A storm rages from the East - tell the men to get below and snuggle up for movie night."

"Lost drone! Reward! Goes by the name of 'Phantom 3'."

Verbal Orders

What really happened on the EVER GIVEN

Solemn Reference is Made to Mr Bunsby

"Get those decks cleaned you swabs!..."

The crew can no longer tolerate Captain Bligh's ruthless splitting of infinitives."

"I don't know what they do with it, son. I just harvest the data."