Q&a Enthusiast T-Shirts

'I'm now going to open the floor to questions.'

"And finally, I'd like to take any questions from the floor."

"Afterward, there will be a short Q. and A. that will be just long enough for one person to take up too much of it."

I hope a starting salary of 80 and a severance of 12 is acceptable....

"I've always dreamed of being on an academic team like this! It's great that we can all depend on each other!"

"O.K., O.K., people - we're not workshopping these, they're already set in stone."

Do you have any other skills?

'And I see you've listed opposable thumbs as your greatest asset...'

'Don't start timing me yet! This staple won't come out!'

"I'm looking for a 'yes man' who can say 'no' without sounding negative"

Senior Jeopardy!

'Your resume and interview were so bad, not only did you not get the job, I'm having you arrested as well.'

"At least we agree to disagree."

Spot Quiz....

And I like to call this my 'dance of the enhanced PEP at alternative firms'.

"You say you’re currently holding down 3 jobs...very impressive."

"So, you want to work at our firm, Eh?"

Help wanted. Various positions available.

"Discussion topic: Is our society becoming less civil and more violent?"

'The position carries no salary, just healthcare coverage.'

"Would you like something you're under qualified for, or something you're overqualified for?"

'He will observe your text now...'

'You don't want the job, do you?'

"And where do you see your mustache in five years?"

'Have you got a resume?'

"Where do you see yourself five lives from now?"

'I see you have extensive experience eating, sleeping, and mating. That puts you two steps ahead of all the college graduates who have applied.'

I think you should go after my job!

Spot the fur ball.

Don't use live interviews as rehearsals-practise and prepare.

"I enjoyed your resume, young man - especially the hand-written addendum from your mom."

"Of course I'm responsible for that marketing plan, but you're responsible for how it turned out!"