Pursuing Weight Loss Gifts

'That's not what I had in mind when I asked for some encouragement!'

'Now that I've lost weight, I can't afford new clothes in my size.'

Zoo. Diet Clinic. Hey everybody --- There's no longer an 800-pound gorilla in the room!

'I won't tell my thighs if you don't..'

'Is your cabbage diet working darling?'

Excess Baggage: Some folks believe that calories consumed during vacation do not count against your diet.

'Yes I do notice an improvement. Your chins don't juggle anymore.'

Woman Weighing Herself on Two Scales.

'Please help mommy lose some weight. She gets grumpy when she's on a diet that's not working.'

'I've found the blockage it looks like your gastric band!'

'I knew it was time to do something when I leapt from the stage to do some body surfing and the crowd parted.'

'I think my diet is finally working. went form a large to an extra medium.'

''Exercise'? -- But I hate to eat and run!'

"Wow. . . Are you expecting or did you nibble on your gingerbread house again?"

"So has this obsession about your weight ever led to thoughts of suicide?"

"My incentive for losing weight? I bought a fitted sheet a size to small."

'However hard I try to lose weight, it always finds me again.'

Woman on running machine next to a cake.

'Ethical farm - none of our produce goes to fast food outlets'.

A tailor measuring a large man

"This is our high-traffic, reinforced, heavy-duty model."

"Ready to head back?"

Cathy decides to remain standing on the scale until she loses weight.

Roger couldn't understand why his diet wasn't working.

'Food has replaced sex in my life. Now I can't even get into my own pants.'

The next big thing

"Buy them - and never look back."

'I'm thinking of having a gastric band fitted to my cigarettes.'

"Would you like your real size or one that artificially inflates your ego?"

Woman stands on scales, holds bunch of balloons.

"So dude, how much ahve you saved up from your job?"

'I'm sick of fast food. I mean, look at the legs on that thing.'

'It's me or the cake....'

'These marks measure how tall the children are growing, the others measure how wide Jeff is getting.'

'I hate her...'