Purring Aficionado Pillows

Looks like this is the only contest Fluffy has a chance of winning today!

"Oh, boy, hard-core sugar!"

"Don't worry, Ref, just shock, it's his first save all season."

Cat Heaven vs Mouse Hell.

Cat Reunion

'Did you want to bring on a sub'

'Yes, Jenny, I know I'm always reminding the team to be good sports, but you really don't have to thank the ref after every call.'

"I'm still looking for the lap of luxury."

'I know how much you like holding hands, so I brought you a box of them..'

"Might I suggest something wicked for dessert?"

United Football Club: In, Out, VAR.

Why moms make bad refs.

Jack in the Box

"Ask the gumshoe. He'll tell ya the saucer was empty when I got there. Go on, gimme a purr detector test. I got all night."

Mum! What's for dessert?! - 'Yoghurt!' - 'Vanilla?' - 'Peach Melba.' - 'Don't call childline, don't call childline, don't call childline, don't call childline.' - '' -

"Awfully quiet... Must be a big game on!"

"How come we never have 'Baked Alaska'?"

'When I was a kid, we had to do our own instant replays.'

"Good lord, Billingsworth. You've stumbled onto the legendary Lepidopterist Graveyard."

Playing football with snowmen in goal.

'He ordered those 'natural male enhancements',and now he watches football all the time!'

"Glendora Hagan got in another load of cats, Elinor honey. Can you take a couple?"

Snowman Football Fan.

'Senior Cat Warranty, Low maintenance sofa accessory, Unlimited purring and cuddling, Mellow 'been there done that' attitude.'

Living with a cataholic.

"Don't you just love that new cat smell?"

"You're God-knows-where all day long, then at night you pounce on my head... this is not a relationship."

Two cats making a heart shape with their tails

Dessert - the most important meal of the day.

"I cloned myself to take care of my Thanksgiving duties while I watch football in peace."

Making Christmas Pudding.