Purrfectionist Gifts

Cat Zoom Meeting

Probability - if you have 5 cats, 4 will be asleep.

Nothing beats the love of a good cat.

Cat Lover's Leap.

Hooray for my Cat! who thinks EVERYTHING I DO is fantastic!

An oxymoron: Cat optimist

"Astonish me."

"Have you made any retirement plans?"

"I like to keep a clean desk...."

"Did you know that cats can give paw?"

"In case you hadn't noticed, this is a multiple cat home!"

Cat Lady

"I think it's unfair to call her a "crazy cat-lady": She just loves all 63 of us..."

Page-a-day calendar. . . Reasons to live - Feed the cats...

Tell me again how aloof and independent cats are.

That's no way to speak to a pedigree cat!

'Quick! Take a picture!'

You're arrogant, aloof and spoiled...but I mean that in the nicest way.

'In case of emergency, is there anyone else we can notify besides your cat?'

'It's strange, it's like he's keeping track of something.'

'Now I really am sick.'

Police Feline Unit

"I want a cat."

"Nine out of ten cats have never agreed on anything."

'Think I preferred the old Irish barman.'

'You're not confident at the water hole are you?'

Golfer to other: 'I've never seen anyone slice a putt before.'

'There! See that? Brad just happens to morph into some kind of hideous amphibian just as he's about to putt? Now tell me she's not cheating!'

We're going on a first date. So many words are misused every day. Literally! I don't accept the use of imperfect language. Me either. Trying to fight it has no effect. It's all a mute point. Irregardless, I could care less. I had nothing farther to say.

"Hmmm, this might just be not funny enough for The New Yorker."

Surreal ale

'Aren't you glad we brought our putters, too?'

Golf lessons

'Not that slowly back...'

"I've heard of being organized, but isn't this a little obsessive compulsive?"