Puppy Punisher T-Shirts

'Bad dog! Bad, bad dog!!'

"Worms."

'I see! And, just how much will it cost if she is in season?'

'What has twelve legs and barks?'

"For the sake of not being redundant, your honor, I feel that one 'bad dog' is sufficient."

"I'm new here. How much do we leave for a tip?"

Presidential Pooch Meets The Press

'Your master isn't due for release until the first of the month.'

"Don't even think about it."

"And with you on guard, I won't have to worry about that monster under my bed."

'Iguana know what time it is.'

"If he tries to dip, Mrs. Callister, you mustn't hesitate to use the choke chain."

'He has a big heart. . . inviting his homeless friends in to stay dry.'

Dog Walker

Mrs Sutherland and her American Hairless Terrier.

"No, we can't get you a new toy every time we go shopping."

Walking the dog - 'surprise'!

Marv was trying to teach Rufus how to be a REAL retriever.

"C'mon, you can do this! Be the sock!"

Dog Basket - I consent to petting.

'Sit, Rollover, Heel'

'He followed me home. Can I keep him?'

'I do not pamper the dog, now get out of his chair!'

'I'm sorry about the slippers...but I do need the roghage.'

'You can come out, Marmaduke. I was just kidding about putting lipstick on you.'

"Stop asking me. I don't know who's a good boy."

"Petting, fetching, receiving belly rubs . . . It all adds to your billable hours."

"And always remember...If you're going to be sick, always do it on the carpet. It's more absorbent."

Wild animal - 1,500 years later...

Should I bark? Flow chart for dogs

"C'mon already...that lipstick really isn't my shade."

"Don’t worry, girl. I’m working on our ‘no puppy left behind.’"

"I can't believe how much I love her. Just look at those sienna eyes and that adorable little nose. I honestly don't know how I'd survive without her." "He has food."

"He wants a second opinion."

"Well, it looks like you found Rexy's sweet spot!"