Punny Punisher T-Shirts

'I was fixin' to fill you full o' lead, Clanton, but it looks like that there stalactite done the job for me!'

"I'd like to let you go, Willy, but this is your third offense."

Kid in time-out writes 'it was the best of time out...'

Dogs life

'Iguana know what time it is.'

Pet Cemetery.

Dog Walker

"After searching for the sun all night, it finally dawned on me..."

"Only 150 kids? - Have you considered fertility treatment?"

King Pin

Happy Hog - Manet

"Actually, There's a lot less pressure since I've gone from his best friend to his therapy dog."

'A lot of my stories involve milk.'

Planting vegetables - "BEAN there done that."

'Ah look, what a lovely tortoise shell cat.'

Licker Store

Stud Finders: 'These don't even work!'

"Honey, I just got 't-boned' off I-80 West of Omaha!"

'That's Princess... formerly 'Prince'.'

SCUBER

Are you guilty or not guilty? What happens if I plead guilty?

"He's a shiitake."

Why cats don't cook. (sign on wall reads: Federal Law requires all employees to wear hairnets)

"Worms."

". . . But, according to your cat, you had a fur ball contract."

"Find another place to dump that crap. This stall is occupied."

I'm afraid I'm going to have to disciplines you, counselor. No problem, your honor. I just happen to have some furry handcuffs in my pocket.

"I wish she's take us. She shops at the 99 scent store!"

-I once dreamed about carrots and peas,and then bet on two horses the next day called carrots and peas. Guess who won? -Who? -An outsider called mixed vegetables.

Happy Hour 5-6, but don't read a lot into it.

Fart. Le Poot.

'I'm not the first visionary who's been accused of extreme optimism.'

"Duffer, Penny, Bailey & Coco. Attorneys at Gnaw."

'That large, rolled up newspaper is a reminder - mess up this office, and you'll pay the price.'

A Tenpin Bowling Pin about to be executed by Bowling balls